zen20

You stand there perfect in every detail to my eye, I admire you from afar but never be allowed to hold, The feeling inside me will not go away, But I can never let it be known for fear of the unknown. My heart has a place for you somewhere deep and treasured, A place that only you could unlock if you said the word, But I know that my ears will never be the ones to hear, And I'll never erase the space to hold another's torch. I see you rarely now these days the miles separate us, But the emotions still lurk there waiting for a lapse, An all to brief moment in time to be close to you, And to show you all that could be ours together.

Troubled. I sit at the table never looking up hoping the knife strays from your hand back to the drawer back to the safety into its dark sheath not to move I know that look the troubled self-doubting before the knife leaves the marks you hide so well the criss-cross the pale flesh turned red the silent cries in the dark of a unlit room The love is there you just can't see it the cold bite into the skin quick and sharp before the release and the bliss inside staunching the scarlet river deep as beauty I hope the blade strays from your grasp never to find your love so deep inside only to leave you intact and safe for you to be u

Dawn. I sit in the dawn, the breeze like your breath caresses the back of my neck, reminding me what is never found. The stray light bathes my face like the smile from your lips, brightening my day, fending the dark clouds from sight. I feel you close but you aren't there, the daybreak wraps itself around me holding me close in the day, always there for me. Then all too fleetingly its over, the sun is high in the heavens and all that was you is gone, all that i knew of you was false.

Painting The fatal artist paints in the colour of life, the bright crimson splashes from his chosen delivery bisecting the pale pink of the canvas, flowing from easel to floor. Again the stroke is delivered forth, forcing the easel onto the floor the crimson flows freely, obscuring the canvas more in the dark studio. The glint in the artist's eye as the easel lays, no more movement in the dim light and the low murmer of the city behind him as he surveys the scene hes made. A quick stoop to sit the easel up, checking the value of the canvas, then off into the night without witness, only police see this true work of art.    

Understanding Was she pushed too far did it really matter, inside it was too late she was already numb. If it was too much why wasn't it stopped, final moments before, long regrets after. The scene is clear no more acts played out, the final curtain, led to a safe place. No longer shall she cry after the dispatch, he lays in immortal sleep, while she lies in chains.

Unjustified I shower the morning after, the water runs over my skin, flows to the drain but does it wash away my sins In the rain i wait soaking, clouds roll over in anger, torrent passes me silently but does it take away my pain. The fire lights the darkness throwing embers skyward, consuming the dead flesh but does it guide me home. You say your picture is false that it does you no justice, I say you are beautiful but it does me no good.

Into the darkness. She sits, staring into the darkness looking for the answers, waiting for a moment to come for a return to normality. The feelings so strong, seem so unreal in the cold truth, daylight holds no fear for the broken soul. Outside the highs and the lows, a walk to the unknown and the entrapment felt inside, wanting to taste the sweet bliss. Does this lovely one, knees drawn close in protection holding all together on the surface, while the tempest rages below. All wanting the knowledge, does the flame still survive, for all her hopes and dreams she still believes it must.

No prescription Another pill goes in, swallowed down dry, no need to help ease the pain only to welcome the darkness. How many left till the release, the time accelerated by alcohol, feeling the mix ease the ache waiting for peace. The blade slides easy over again retracing familiar steps, causing the opening to widen letting the life flow freely. In time there will be love but right now, there is nothing, no one will care about this soul hardened and now forlorn.

Release in the dark. In the kitchen all is quiet, there is no one to see the act, as the bottle lays drained resting on the counter Blade glints in the moonlight, flesh reflects in the steel, as it slips from fingers after the deed is done. A sharp rush then the dull pain arms held to chest, as crimson stains the fabric ebbing slowly but not fast enough. No mess can be seen nor known, all is wiped clean after the act, long sleeves hide the tale that will continue till release.

The light picks out the smoke, the bodies flow and ebb but all i see is you all there is, is you. I stand to the side, let you float on past you flow with the stream not knowing of my desire. You are washed away gone on the tide with my heart taking my love where you go on your drifting path. The shore is a cold place, where the sea of love may lead to a warmth that i have yet to feel.